The Lesbian Lifetime Evolution

Disclaimer: This evolution does not apply to all lesbians…it is merely opinion and a micro-cultural observation-based account.

A woman realizes she loves women.
Living consists of relationship-making in secret…online, in person.
Then “coming out” happens (hopefully).
Living consists mainly of relationship-making and career-building.
Party, savor living, travel (not in any order).
Then continuing with marriage, travel, and maybe raising children.
Middle-aged life rolls on, maintaining or changing careers, becoming an expert juggler of personal/family time and work life.
Travel.
Work.
Savor.
Family.
Travel.
Work.
Savor.
Family
Travel.
Work.
Savor.
Family.

The end.

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Baby, It’s been cold outside…

The deep freeze here in New England is finally over (for now), and I’m back from my holiday hiatus!

And I’ve got wonderful news!
I’m pregnant with our first daughter!!!

I’ve been keeping the secret out of the blogosphere until I was into my 2nd trimester. Wifey and I are beyond thrilled….we’re excited, anxious, and a little nervous…all normal feelings. I am due in July and I hope this blog will evolve with me as I dive into parenthood and beyond.

Latest lesbian problem: androgynous, simple maternity clothing. Yes, I’m showing, however I don’t look preggo, I only look fat and sloppily dressed due to lack of proper wardrobe for said belly. Every maternity shirt I find has either a scoop or boat neck, a super-feminine print, or has some frilly crap on it. Sure I could wear oversized sweatshirts and maternity jeans (which there are plentiful choices), but I absolutely cannot wear that to work. For sure, this is an untapped market. Gap and Old Navy try hard, but their tops just don’t cut the mustard. I welcome any and all suggestions!

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Well, Which Is It?

Husband & Wife?
Partners?
Husbands?
Wives?
Spouses?
SO (significant other)?

In this modern age, in America, in Boston MA, the first state to legalize same sex marriage, it frustrates me to no end that people still use terminology that excludes many legally married people.

And I hear it from all sorts of people: cable TV customer service, Dr.’s office receptionists, medical professionals, manicurists, co-workers…you name it!

It’s time for the people of America to get with the program!

Sometimes when strangers ask about my husband, I simply reply that I do not have one of those, that I have a wife, and I’m sure to include a death stare.

Actually, I like to think I am grateful for every one of these occurrences, because every time I correct someone, I’m hopefully opening their eyes to the world around them.

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Vacation : to gay or not to gay

The first snowflakes of the season fell unexpectedly this morning. And It has strengthened my everlasting travel cravings. My wife and I love to travel. We love exploring and having new adventures. But because we’ve been trying to get pregnant for the last 6 months, it’s been nearly impossible to plan a vacation. So lately as winter has been creeping in, I’ve been daydreaming of warm sandy beach vacations like crazy. Today I’m thinking about where we’ve been and why.

My wife and I have been on several kinds of vacations, before and after we were married. We have been to several very gay-friendly destinations including Key West, Fort Lauderdale, and Montreal. We visit Provincetown several times a year because we live so close to there. The reason we’ve chosen these vacays is not that we’re afraid to vacation with straight people, but that we simply prefer the GLBT community. I feel the most comfortable around this group. I would love to re-visit any of these places.

We’ve also been on 2 Olivia all-women cruises. Although we had great experiences on both trips, we have concluded that Olivia just isn’t for us. It’s a combination of the cruise line they use and the exorbitant price they charge in order to travel with all women.

We’ve also been to lesser-gay locales like Mexico, Clearwater FL, Niagara Falls, Maine, the Outerbanks, and Vegas. We’ve been totally out during all if our vacays and I’ve been consistently surprised by how welcomed we have felt. And it’s because of those experiences that it encourages us to want to continue exploring outside if the GLBT-majority vacay box.

We’ve found that being open to traveling with the straights is much cheaper!

The important advice I have for GLBT couples who are traveling is to always pack copies of your marriage certificates (if you are married), and health care proxies (even if you are married). And do your research about the destination before you book. Places still exist in this world where GLBT are simply not welcome.

Ugh. All this vacation talk is making me want to take a siesta on a beach chair somewhere!

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